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For the love of god, will you people who tailgate please get some psychological help.

For the record, I am not a slow, crawling driver. Anything but, actually. I’ve had my share of speeding tickets, and beieve 55mph is a ridiculously slow speed limit on most highways of this country. 65mph can be found on some highways across the country, but not nearly enough, Furthermore, even on non busy non highway roads, anything below 50mph tests my patience of the law. Don’t even get me started on the absurd 25mph zones that are deliberately speed traps set in place to fund city and precinct holiday funds.

I don’t suffer from road rage. Really. I swear I don’t. Does that mean I don’t, or can’t get upset at a certain type of driver? Hell no! I have major animosity towards a very particular kind of driver. The tailgater. More specifically, the tailgater behind me at 75mph, who cant hold his dick for thirty seconds while I wait for a moment to pull into the right lane so he can get to whatever it is that is giving his life the deep meaning he has to experience to act like a jerk. One thing I’ve seen often is many of these high speed left lane tailgaters move back over into the right lane in 1/4 mile, and exit off the highway, just after they pass me! Seriously. Are you kidding me?

I’m on the road literally putting my life on the line every time I put my foot on the gas pedal and enter a traffic flow. So are all of you. Most of us know what kind of drivers we are. Some of us are fairly accurate in our self assessments. Others, less so. Unfortunately, there is a third group of drivers that are living in some alternate plane of perception. They do not have any grasp on any reality of what kind of drivers they are. The most deficient of that group don’t care what kind of driver they are. They are concerned with one thing, and one thing only. To get from one point to another. Everybody else, get out of their way, or…or else!

Do I have road rage? Not the kind that forces me into a car chase fiasco after someone who cut me off. No. I don’t have that kind of road rage. I have road discouragement. Road sadness. Road disillusionment. Not life threatening, but still, bad news for my sense of peace on the nations roadways. And that’s a tragic state to be in.


BUMPER STICKER IDEAS:

  • Hello Asshole
  • Please hit me. I need my rear bumper repaired.
  • Guess who’s insurance pays for you hitting me from behind?
  • If I step on the brakes, and you hit me. Its your fault.
  • If you can read this, you are a menace. Get off the roads.
  • Get off my ass, you stupid, fu**ing, non driving, jackass!