The following article was originally published in July as cities started reopening. Opposing personal views on safety at that time caused ruptures among many families, friends and partners. Today, nearly five months later, the pandemic is back with a vengeance, and returned lockdowns across the globe. Disagreements that existed in July with a lower viral risk, are now magnified with a more serious risk of consequences from people’s actions outside of their households. Beyond the vaccine and the indefinite future after that, this reality is not going away any time soon.
Beautifully simple and straightforward to follow.
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Tackle Reopening Choices as a Couple
By Amelia Nierenberg, NYTimes
Around the world, couples are struggling to cope with the stress that comes with reopening cities and towns (and the pausing or rolling back that, in some places, has ensued). For some, tension has run high for months: As Eric Spiegelman, a podcasting executive based in Los Angeles, tweeted in April, “My wife and I play this fun game during quarantine, it’s called ‘Why Are You Doing It That Way?’ and there are no winners.”
That might’ve been in jest, but with the possibility of resuming certain pre-lockdown activities — going to restaurants, seeing friends, working out at gyms — couples are in the process of addressing differing comfort levels.
One partner might have parents who are older and at higher risk of complications from the coronavirus; the other might be an extrovert who thrives on being around other people and is, emotionally, at a breaking point. And, together, they could face questions like: Should we go to a friend’s barbecue, even though it probably won’t be rigidly socially distant? Who do we invite to our daughter’s birthday party, if we even have it at all?
“The traditional marriage vows are ‘for better or for worse,’” said Jean Fitzpatrick, a relationship therapist based in Manhattan. “This is for worse. And so how do we navigate a time like this? Our relationships will either grow as a result, or they will be harmed.”
Below, some strategies you can use to find a path forward that works for both of you.
Remember that you are on the same team.
Soujanya Sridharan, a recent graduate of a master’s program in Bangalore, India, had started to plan her wedding before the lockdown; she and her fiancé expected 300 people to celebrate with them. Then, the coronavirus hit India, now one of the worst affected countries. She wanted to go forward with fewer guests, but her fiancé was more reluctant: Some of his family members wouldn’t be able to come, and he is more worried about contracting the virus himself.
“When he resisted the idea of going ahead with the wedding, it made me wonder if the lockdown had actually changed his mind about going ahead at all, as opposed to getting married at that time,” said Ms. Sridharan, 23.
They talked through it and worked together to find solutions — whittling down their guest list, showing outfits to each other over Zoom and developing safety measures. He wanted to wear masks in the wedding photos, but saw how much it meant to his bride-to-be to have keepsakes that didn’t reference the pandemic, so he took off his mask for a few pictures.
“Once you feel respected and heard, you usually can negotiate anything,” said Deb Owens, a licensed therapist specializing in relationships who is based in the Philadelphia area. She has been regularly speaking with couples struggling during the lockdown.
In difficult situations, therapists often recommend thinking not just of “you” and “me,” but talking about your relationship as a third entity.
“It’s not, ‘My needs versus your needs, and let’s negotiate,’ but asking the question and having the posture of: ‘What is best for our relationship?’” said Jennifer Bullock, a psychotherapist based in Philadelphia.
Important, too, several psychologists and counselors recommended presenting a united front when explaining shared decisions to friends and family. Any sort of “I would, but he’s afraid” seeds resentment and can amplify the problem far past the boundaries of your own home.
Stay away from ‘right’ and ‘wrong.’
It’s always tempting to drop some knowledge when you’re in the middle of an argument. But some therapists think appealing to data, in lieu of listening to the emotions and concerns of your partner, is a losing strategy.
“People just need to consistently ask themselves: ‘Would you rather be right, or would you rather be in a loving, connected relationship?’” said Jenny TeGrotenhuis, a licensed mental health therapist and certified clinical trauma professional based in Kennewick, Wash.
David Woodsfellow, a licensed psychologist and the director of the Woodsfellow Institute for Couples Therapy in Atlanta, agreed. He said that thinking about things in terms of “right” and “wrong” is often less helpful than trying to understand how and what the other person feels.
“Try to understand what they are saying and why they are saying it,” Dr. Woodsfellow said. “It is totally possible to understand things you don’t agree with.”
Of course, facts and concrete information are helpful and often necessary when considering joint decisions, like how safe it is to send children to camp or how long another family would have to quarantine before you became a pod. But when you’re offering data, make sure you’re doing it in the spirit of educating and working with your partner, rather than hammering your own point home.
Don’t assume you can read your partner’s mind.
Some of the most common things that the psychotherapist Matt Lundquist hears are: “I already know what she is going to say,” or, “I already know what he thinks.” It’s almost always untrue, though.
“I will plead with them to suspend their disbelief and really work to deeply and sincerely engage in curiosity,” said Mr. Lundquist, the owner and clinical director at Tribeca Therapy in Manhattan.
In any fraught situation, sit down with your partner and listen. Instead of offering rebuttals, try to treat it more like an interview about where he or she is coming from. Ms. Fitzpatrick suggests asking only open-ended questions — which can’t be answered with a simple “yes” or a “no.” Some of the most tense discussions might be about work or money. You could try, “How are you feeling about our finances right now?” Or if you have been working from home: “How should we approach our safety when you go back to the office?”
Karen Osterle, a couples therapist based in Washington, D.C., said to give your partner the benefit of the doubt. She suggests using language like: “I know you probably don’t mean to come across as dismissive or condescending right now, but when I hear you say I shouldn’t worry, I find myself feeling disregarded.” Or, “Can you see what I mean, even if you don’t mean to make me feel that way?”
A partner’s need might come across as just a preference — for example, if one of you wants to visit family in a different state, it might seem like something that can be postponed. But it could be that a parent really needs help, or your partner is overwhelmed. You’ll find out what’s going on only if you ask.
You’ll know you have truly listened when you can describe your partner’s perspective in a supportive way — regardless of whether you agree with him or her.
Find a way to do both things.
Just as fights about the dishes aren’t ever just about the dishes, fights about going to a birthday party post-lockdown aren’t just about the party. Look deeper into the anxieties and frustrations undergirding each position and see if you can fulfill the emotion without doing the precise activity.
“It’s looking beyond ‘I want to go to this restaurant and sit on the patio’ to: ‘What might that mean to you? What does that represent?’” said Samuel Allen, a licensed marriage and family therapist with Keith Miller Counseling & Associates, a private practice based in Washington.
The good news is that there are creative solutions. If one person really needs to get out and see friends, a socially distanced day at the park might be an option.
“This is not just like, ‘What is a middle ground?’” Dr. Allen said. “It’s, ‘What is another method, what is another way that we can meet the need that prompted your original request?’ Ask: ‘What will that bring you, and what are other ways we can achieve it together?’”
Don’t forget, though, this is a pandemic.
Maybe you’re tired of cooking for yourself and another person, and restaurants nearby have tantalizingly reopened. Or you could be exhausted from running after your kids and hear of a summer camp with space available. Ultimately, your well-being and others’ should take precedence.
“Everyone’s concerns need to be respected, and all of the adults in a family system need to be respected as full voting members, but that doesn’t mean that each of the adult concerns are equivalent,” Mr. Lundquist said. “I do generally feel that the person who is more concerned about an issue of health and safety needs to be given a lot of deference.”
There are thousands of cults in America, some harmless and some that can be very dangerous. A cult is a group or movement held together by a shared commitment to a charismatic leader or ideology. It has a belief system that has the answers to all of life’s questions and offers a special solution to be gained only by following the leader’s rules. It requires a high level of commitment from at least some of the members.
How Do Cults Start Up?
There’s four dimensions to a cultic group that is seen across the board…
Cults come in a variety of shapes and sizes. Not every person’s experience will fit neatly into these following categories, but this list should provide some idea of the range of cults and their reach into every walk of life.
Eastern cults
Eastern cults are characterized by belief in spiritual enlightenment and reincarnation, attaining the Godhead, and nirvana. Usually the leader draws from and distorts an Eastern-based philosophy or religion, such as Hinduism, Buddhism, Sikhism, or Sufism. Sometimes members learn to disregard worldly possessions and may take on an ascetic and/or celibate lifestyle. Practices and influence techniques include extensive meditation, repeated mantras, altered states of consciousness, celibacy or sexual restrictions, fasting and dietary restrictions, special dress or accoutrements, altars, and induced trance through chanting, spinning, or other techniques.
Religious cults
Religious cults are marked by belief in a god or some higher being, salvation, and the afterlife, sometimes combined with an apocalyptic view. The leader reinterprets Scripture (from the Bible, Koran, Talmud, or Cabala) and often claims to be a prophet, if not the messiah. Typically the group is strict, sometimes using such physical punishments as paddling and birching, particularly of children. Often members are encouraged to spend a great deal of time proselytizing. Included here are Bible-based, neo-Christian, Islamic, Jewish or Hebrew, and other religious cults, many of which combine beliefs and practices from different faiths. Practices and influence techniques include speaking in tongues, chanting, praying, isolation, lengthy study sessions, faith healing, self-flagellation, or many hours spent evangelizing, witnessing, or making public confessions.
Political, racist, or terrorist cults
Political, racist, or terrorist cults are fueled by belief in changing society, revolution, overthrowing the perceived enemy or getting rid of evil forces. The leader professes to be all knowing and all powerful. In some cases, adherents may be more drawn to an extreme ideology rather than a leader per se. Groups tend to operate as secret cells. Often the group and/or individuals are armed and engage in violent activities, including arson, kidnapping, bombing, and suicide bombs. Such groups typically meet in secret with coded language, handshakes, and other ritualized practices. Members consider themselves an elite cadre ready to go to battle. Practices and influence techniques include paramilitary training, reporting on one another, fear, struggle or criticism sessions, instilled paranoia, violent acts to prove loyalty, long hours of indoctrination, or enforced guilt based on race, class, or religion.
Psychotherapy, human potential, mass transformational cults
Psychotherapy, human potential, mass transformational cults are motivated by belief in striving for the goal of personal transformation and personal improvement. The leader is self-proclaimed and omniscient, with unique insights, sometimes a “super-therapist” or “super-life coach.” Practices and techniques include group encounter sessions, intense probing into personal life and thoughts, altered states brought about by hypnosis and other trance-induction mechanisms, use of drugs, dream work, past-life or future-life therapy, rebirthing or regression, submersion tanks, shame and intimidation, verbal abuse, or humiliation in private or group settings.
Commercial, multi-marketing cults
Commercial, multi-marketing cults are sustained by belief in attaining wealth and power, status, and quick earnings. The leader, who is often overtly lavish, asserts that he has found the “way.” Some commercial cults are crossovers to political and religious cults because they are based on ultra-conservative family values, strict morals, good health, or patriotism. Members are encouraged to participate in costly and sometimes lengthy seminars and to sell the group’s “product” to others. Practices and influence techniques include deceptive sales techniques, guilt and shame, peer pressure, financial control, magical thinking, or guided imagery.
New Age cults
New Age cults are founded on belief in the “You are God” philosophy, in power through internal knowledge, wanting to know the future, or find the quick fix. Often the leader presents herself or himself as mystical, an ultra-spiritual being, a channeler, a medium, or a superhero. New Age groups, more so than some of the other types, tend to have female leaders. Members rely on New Age paraphernalia, such as crystals, astrology, runes, shamanic devices, holistic medicine, herbs, spirit beings, or Tarot or other magic cards. Practices and influence techniques: magic tricks, altered states, peer pressure, channeling, UFO sightings, “chakra” adjustments, faith healing, or claiming to speak with or through ascended masters, spiritual entities, and the like.
Occult, satanic, or black-magic cults
Occult, satanic, or black-magic cults are generated through belief in supernatural powers, and sometimes worship of Satan. The leader professes to be evil incarnate. Animal sacrifice and physical and sexual abuse are common; some groups claim they perform human sacrifice. Practices and influence techniques include exotic and bizarre rituals, secrecy, fear and intimidation, acts of violence, tattooing or scarring, cutting and blood rituals, sacrificial rituals, or altars.
One-on-one or family cults
One-on-one or family cults are based in belief in one’s partner, parent, or teacher above all else. Generally an intimate relationship is used to manipulate and control the partner, children, or students, who believe the dominant one to have special knowledge or special powers. Often there is severe and prolonged psychological, physical, and sexual abuse. Practices and influence techniques include pleasure/pain syndrome, promoting self-blame, induced dependency, induced fear and insecurity, enforced isolation, battering and other violent acts, incest, or deprivation.
Cults of personality
Cults of personality are rooted in a belief that reflects the charismatic personality and interests and proclivities of the revered leader. Such groups tend to revolve around a particular theme or interest, such as martial arts, opera, dance, theater, a certain form of art, or a type of medicine or healing. Practices and influence techniques include intense training sessions, rituals, blatant egocentrism, or elitist attitudes and behaviors
Who Joins Cults and Why?
No particular psychopathology profile is associated with cult involvement, in part because cults, like many effective sales organizations, adjust their pitch to the personality and needs of their prospects. Although cult members appear to have a somewhat higher rate of psychological distress than nonmembers, the majority seems to lie within the normal range. Nevertheless, clinical experience strongly suggests that certain situational or developmental features appear to make people more receptive to cult sales pitches, including:
a high level of stress or dissatisfaction
lack of self-confidence
gullibility
desire to belong to a group
naive idealism
Fulfillment (the cult provides something that they are missing)
cultural disillusionment
frustrated spiritual searching
Mental Illness
For decades there have been studies about the various mental issues that cult leaders and their followers have. Most cult leaders have Narcissistic personality disorder, Symptoms include an excessive need for admiration, disregard for others’ feelings, an inability to handle any criticism, and a sense of entitlement. As for the followers, most people who join a cult are just going through a mental crisis and that cult seems to offer relief or fulfillment. Many ex- cult followers have issues adjusting back to society and have a number of mental illnesses. For the most part, the mental state plays an important role in people who join a cult or is a cult leader.
The scores for the six prevalence and nine access to treatment measures make up the Prevalence and Access to Care Ranking.
The 6 measures that make up the Prevalence Ranking include:
Adults with Any Mental Illness (AMI)
Adults with Dependence or Abuse of Illicit Drugs or Alcohol
Adults with Serious Thoughts of Suicide
Youth with At Least One Past Year Major Depressive Episode (MDE)
Youth with Dependence or Abuse of Illicit Drugs or Alcohol
Youth with Severe MDE.
Religion
The 1960s counterculture movement which was all about peace, love, and happiness lead to freedom of expression. That freedom of expression lead to people starting there own religion, groups, cults, etc. Religious cults started off being about religion but transformed due to narcissistic leaders. In almost every cult there is a higher being, whether that is the leader or that being. Cults are almost like religion except they are not granted tax-free status from the government.
I really hate posting this stuff. I can think of countless other topics I would prefer. I’ve drained my tank of political diatribe. That ship sailed out of my emotional dock many months ago when I decided it was healthier to take a breath and envision the next election which is closer in sight now.
So much for that plan.
The Covid virus situation has now supplanted my short lived peace of mind and once again made it difficult to contain my stress because of other people’s behavior. Again, I am challenged to channel myself away from it all, but this time, its harder.
Its harder, because, unlike confrontational political creatures who we can physically distance ourselves from, we can only distance ourselves so much from the behavior of people flouting social distancing guidelines in a pandemic. The inconvenient truth is that flouters of social distance guidelines affect our public health risk. In a big way. In a (Knock! Knock! Hello! Is anyone home??) PANDEMIC kind of way.
What’s really disturbing to me is how people around me in my own community, and circles, and clearly too many other parts of this country, seem to think there is a straight line from deciding, or not deciding, to observe social distance guidelines. Their rationale appears to be, if I don’t want to relax my own social guidelines, then I don’t have to be around those who are willing to relax them, and I should not be lecturing, or spoiling anybody else’s fun.
I don’t recall seeing “teacher” show up on the career compatibility test I took when I was twenty-one, but I am called upon to play that role now.
Today’s lesson begins and ends with the simple formula of how a pandemic starts…
Person #1 observes social distancing tightly, controlling contact outside their household to essential purposes.
Person #2 observes social distancing loosely, interacting in social gatherings beyond household members.
Person #2 contracts the Covid-19 virus from the social gatherings.
Person #2 then comes in contact later with Person #1.
Person #1, who practiced tighter social distancing than Person #2, is now exposed to the same Covid-19 virus because of Person #2.
All of this potentially takes place in a single day or two with no one knowing it because the symptoms take 1-2 weeks to appear, which then allow both Persons #1, and #2, to unknowingly transmit the virus to someone else. The rate of transmission is reported to be 3 to 1. Do the math. Presto! Pandemic!
If the above crash course lesson doesn’t explain why someone else’s behavior is completely relevant to mine, and exponentially, everyone else, who is trying to hold the fort here, then I can’t help you any further. You may think social distancers like me are spoiling your fun, but if this trend below plays out further, you will be the ones spoiling it for everybody.
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From ABC News:
Why People are Flouting Coronavirus Social Distancing Precautions That We Know Save Lives
Experts say factors like risk aversion play a heavy role.
By
Ivan Pereira
May 30, 2020, 10:57 AM
10 min read
People packed into a pool at Lake of the Ozarks, Missouri.Parks in New York City, the epicenter of the outbreak, jammed with sunbathers.A crowded brunch spot in Colorado with diners celebrating Mother’s Day.With more than 100,000 Americans dead and rising from the novel coronavirus, health experts and other leaders have been pleading for people to adhere to their strict guidelines to keep people safe.But all too recently, these and other examples, large and small, have emerged of people blatantly defying social distancing and face-covering rules.
Psychology experts said they haven’t been surprised by this type of behavior, since it’s been a long-standing issue with public health: the ability for people to assess risk. Rajita Sinha, a professor of psychiatry at Yale University and the founding director of the Yale Stress Center, said the uncertainty about when the pandemic will end, access to information and one’s underlying beliefs can influence someone to flout precautions.
“Those features of the current pandemic really put into gear people’s need for control which is an important aspect of coping,” she told ABC News. “Gaining control is a basic way we cope.”
Sinha and other health experts say there is no easy solution to the problem, but there are ways to help those individuals see the need for health precautions.
She noted that risk is a very abstract concept to people. While some people may look at the COVID-related news and feel fear from the images of sick patients, others may want to take their chances, Sinha said.
“If you’re in a bad scenario where there is a lot of danger…if you worried you may not be able to get yourself out, there is a mechanism where we just plow along,” she said.
Joshua Ackerman, associate professor of psychology at the University of Michigan, who has studied behaviors related to infectious diseases, said individualism also plays a part in adhering to guidelines.
“If people think masks are self-protection and you don’t think you’ll need protection, you won’t wear them,” he told ABC News.
Sten Vermund, the dean of Yale School of Public Health, likened the behavior to running a red light.
“They don’t perceive enough personal risk and they don’t have a sense of altruism that is acute,” he told ABC News.
Attitudes on masks and social distancing are mixed in the U.S., according to polling from ABC News and Ipsos. At the end of April, a large majority of the country (82%) were concerned about coronavirus and just 14% thought stay-at-home orders restricted personal liberty. Earlier in April, an ABC News/Ipsos poll found that 55% of Americans had worn a mask in the last week.
While guidance on social distancing has largely been consistent and long-standing — staying 6 feet away from others to prevent the transmission of respiratory droplets, avoiding large gatherings and staying home — wearing a mask has been has been much murkier. Public health officials initially suggested that people not wear masks and instead reserve them for health workers, but on April 3, they recommended that people wear cloth masks in public to prevent asymptomatic transmission.
That message has been further confused by President Trump generally refusing to wear a mask, despite the CDC recommendation.
Information, particularly that which is circulating in one’s immediate circle, is an important factor for people’s behavior’s during the pandemic, according to Ackerman. Even though the U.S. leads the world with over 1.7 million cases, there are whole counties, particularly in rural communities, where there are few or no cases. The pandemic looks very different in those places compared to hotspots such as New York City.
Ackerman said the lack of centralized and consistent health-related messaging from local, state and federal leaders and the polarization of news sources will lead people to make different choices.
“People listen to information and they use that to calculate their own risk. In situations like this, sometimes the accuracy of the information is far less important to the availability of that information,” he said.
Tune into ABC at 1 p.m. ET and ABC News Live at 4 p.m. ET every weekday for special coverage of the novel coronavirus with the full ABC News team, including the latest news, context and analysis.
Sinha said that the sometimes lax response to COVID can be amplified where others act similarly for the same reasons. She pointed out the examples of rallies and other demonstrations of people who have expressed frustration with the rise in unemployment and the loss of other social norms.
“They’re worried about work and unemployment and other stressors affecting them and family. They’re not paying attention to everything else,” Sinha said. Many protesters at reopening rallies around the country have, however, worn masks.
Vermund said there are also Americans who don’t have direct connections with the people most vulnerable to COVID, like the elderly or immunocompromised, so it may take longer for them to grasp the need for precautions. Although the true number of infected is unknown, just a fraction of the country has had confirmed COVID cases and a vast number of those have been concentrated in the urban Northeast.
“We lived through this during the HIV era,” he explained. “During the early years, 1981, 1982, people were not changing their behaviors because they weren’t so close to people who got ill. By 1985, the pandemic was so striking and so many people got to know people who got ill and died, that behaviors started to change.”
Ackerman said there will likely be increasing cases of people not adhering to social distancing and face-covering precautions as states being to reopen their economies. He noted the psychological notion of “goal completion” — in this case, the sense that the pandemic may be over because life appears to be returning to normal — may give some people a false sense of security.
“If we think about the information provided to people…one of the goals given was that we have to flatten the curve. To the extent that people think that the curve has been flattened, they might think the worst is behind them,” he said.
He and other health experts, however, said the public can still turn things around and increase compliance with social distancing rules. Sinha said people are more prone to comply with health orders if they have a clear understanding of how it affects the people around them.
Even if it is just one person articulating to a friend or family member that the face masks and distracting practices help the greater good, it could get them to change their minds and pass it on, according to Sinha.
“There is no reason it can’t be done if you can build a narrative around it. If you articulate the full narrative that we are shifting gears and preparing for the next phase, some people will listen,” she said.
First off, contrary to the posed question of the headline below, I am most certainly NOT ready to expand my quarantine bubble. I’ve been off the radar for any social hubbubs for three months. I don’t see any compelling reason to return to the fray at this moment in time. It ‘aint gonna kill me to wait awhile longer. My id, ego, superego, and other parts of my psyche will survive intact. I’m not going to decline some dark rabbit hole of shrinking self worth because I can’t drink bloody mary’s and or martinis in meetups for another few weeks. It ‘aint gonna kill me. And it ‘aint gonna kill you. On the other hand, if you don’t want to wait to do your social thangs, shop, eat out, and pocket your mask in confident defiance, that could kill you. And, it could kill me. I didn’t write this script, folks. Somebody else did. I’m just not interested in re-wrtiing it.
“Why not?” You may ask. To which I would answer with another question to you…”Why should I?” To which you may answer…”Well, the state is reopening and relaxing social guidelines.” To which I would say…”Oh really? Why are they doing that?” To which you would answer “Positive test results have gone down.” To which I would say,..”That is an unreliable marker at this time, which may not reflect the true viral presence. You need to read more about how higher testing volume skews reality, plus the bad testing itself, which is only 50% accurate, plus bungled CDC and state testing results.” To which you might answer…”I don’t have time for this banter, or to read these things. I miss my friends. I miss shopping. I miss eating out!” To which I would say… “Good luck, take care, and I’ll see you every two weeks between your forays.”
Ready to expand your quarantine bubble? Here’s what you need to know
The answer, experts say, depends on where you live and what social precautions you practice.
As states reopen, the public is grappling with how to have safe social interactions. (Getty Images.)
TODAY
By Maura Hohman
With restaurants and other nonessential businesses reopening across the country, many Americans have taken this as a sign it’s safe to return to behavior from before the coronavirus lockdown.
The truth is, though, whether you can socialize freely depends largely on where you live, Dr. Sten Vermund, dean of Yale’s School of Public Health in New Haven, Connecticut, told TODAY.
For example, in towns where the case count is zero, it may be safe “to go back to life normally,” he said. For areas with relatively low circulation of the virus, he added, the question for public health professionals becomes: What’s the probability that social interaction will “rekindle the forest fire” of widespread transmission?
Regardless of the state you live in, knowing the case counts and local guidance for your area is paramount. Vermund recommended websites like COVIDcommitment.org and HowWeFeel.org.
This data should inform how you decide to socialize, if at all, as nothing right now is “100% risk-free,” Robert Bednarczyk, PhD, professor at Rollins School of Public Health at Emory University in Atlanta, Georgia, told TODAY.
Here’s more specific guidance to determine if it’s safe to see friends and family now and in the future.
Is it safe to see friends right now?
Again, the answer depends largely on where you live. If that’s an area that still has stay-at-home orders in place, like New York City or Los Angeles, then you should stick to socializing just with people in your household, Hilary Godwin, PhD, dean of University of Washington’s School of Public Health in Seattle, told TODAY.
Right now, most if not all states have banned mass gatherings, like you’d see at a bar or concert. So continue to avoid these settings, even outdoors, and don’t have large groups at your home.
For interactions less packed than parties but aren’t outdoors with 6 feet, Bednarczyk explained that there’s “spectrum” of safety. “It’s not necessarily a good-versus-bad type of situation … Having one person over to your house is at a lower end of the spectrum.”
Godwin also stressed that the physical distance aspect is the most important part of reducing risk.
“The most frequent way (COVID-19) seems to be spreading is people in close proximity to each other indoors for extended periods of time,” she explained. “The perfect way to reintroduce getting together socially with friends would be sitting out on your front porch on chairs that are 6 feet apart … hanging out with good separation outside where there’s air circulating.”
How can we socialize safely in the coming weeks to months?
Following guidance from local health departments is the best way to gauge what’s safe, Vermund said, adding that until there are explicit changes, take as many precautions as possible.
In the absence of specific rules, Godwin advised expanding social interactions slowly so authorities can determine whether they’re impacting the spread of the coronavirus in the community. It’s not “a light switch” where groups gathering will suddenly be safe, she said.
Before meeting up with friends, look for signs that your community can handle the risk, Godwin continued. For example, if you live in an area with sparse testing or frequent news coverage of an overwhelmed health care system, these are signs it’s not a good time to expand your circle.
If you choose to socialize with people outside your household, she recommended picking “COVID buddies” — people who only interact with each other and have similar risks related to the coronavirus and behavioral patterns. You also want people with similar “philosophies on precautions,” she said. This way, if one person takes risks, there’s no unnecessary exposure for others because the rest of the group behaves the same way.
But again, keep an eye on your local health department’s website. It can take weeks for the effects of reopening to materialize, and it’s possible that restrictions will tighten again, Vermund said.
What will the rest of the year look like for social interactions?
“What we’re all hoping for is in the next month or two, most regions will start shifting into this limited social interaction phase,” Godwin said. “While we’re in that phase, we’ll check to make sure the number of cases don’t get out of control, and then we’ll start allowing slightly larger gatherings.”
In the mean time, pay attention to state and local guidance, and follow the big four, as Vermund called them:
Physical distance of 6 feet
Face coverings
Hand hygiene
Opting for the outdoors
What if you’re high risk for the coronavirus?
For demographics who could become severely ill from COVID-19, like people over 65 or with underlying conditions, the inevitable risks of social interaction are greater. These groups “need to avoid getting infected at all costs,” Vermund said.
So, be “aggressive” about precautions, he added. Tell people around you to wear masks and maintain 6 feet of distance. In addition, Godwin encouraged these individuals to self-isolate ideally until there are no cases of the coronavirus in their area.
